System Shock

I am such a mix of emotions these days. I think Nicaragua is kind of a shock to my system, in both positive and negative ways. The people are so welcoming and so loving and generous- which is really unique. I mean, I kind of think of the south as being very welcoming and people are more friendly and all. But this is in a different way. These people welcome you as if you’re a long lost family member, and they really really treat you as if you’re their kid. It’s been really touching- and yet makes me feel really guilty. For instance let me tell you about my Saturday: My Saturday was absolutely incredible! Alma, who is on the board of directors for the elderly home, took me with her family to go to Masaya and see this active volcano!! Talk about awesome! Then she took me to Granada, the first city of Nicaragua, and we toured around. Alma paid for all the entrance fees, and lunch. I kept offering, and she wouldn’t accept money. Money things here make me really uncomfortable. Alma also took me out to dinner my first night in Jinotepe and has brought me to her mom’s house for dinner twice. Her whole family (children, cousins, aunts, uncles etc) want to know me, so we just sit for hours talking and talking. So basically, she’s investing a lot in me being here, simply because she wants to. That generosity is so amazing to witness, but I can’t help but feel bad about it.

The subject of money has come up a few times, and when it does, my stomach just knots.  Alma’s nephew was telling me about how he works for an American money exchange company call-center, which outsources to Nicaragua, the Philippines, and India. He works for $500/month (which comes out to about $2/hr)…he also works 6 days a week (as do most Nicaraguans) instead of 5. He started talking about how much an American doing the same job makes- but thinks he’s lucky that the US is providing him a job. Oh the ethics of outsourcing…

Today I was walking to work with Zoila and we had to stop at her son’s school so that she could pay the monthly tuition. She told me how her friend who lives in San Fransisco sends her 10$/month so that she can afford to send her son to school.  My stomach twisted when I thought about the fact that I waste more than that every month on things like coffee or stupid things I don’t need.

Seeing the poverty every day is taking a toll on me too. It really hits you hard to be in the middle of such a needy place and not being able to help as much as you would want to.  But things can’t change overnight. So all I can do is keep doing my best here at the elderly home.  I’ll keep you posted!

~Rachel~